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TEEN ACHE

My parents would be shocked beyond belief if they knew what I do. They have brought me up with good morals and values. Still, I cannot resist this exciting urge when we three friends go “shopping”. They tell me that this is not wrong, but just some fun. Please advise.
I am a 15-year-old schoolgirl who has got into the habit of stealing small articles from shops. My two good friends introduced me to this by convincing me that it was all for fun. Now, to my shame, I quite enjoy the challenge of pilfering from under the shopman’s nose!

You are well on the way to becoming a kleptomaniac – a person who cannot resist stealing things which belong to others! Of course, what you girls are doing is a crime – stealing, plain and simple – although it seems like harmless fun to you. There is a great risk of your getting caught. Can you imagine your embarrassment and shame then?

Stop this behaviour at once. Perhaps you girls are feeling bored and are trying to get some thrills with this activity. Channel your energy into healthy pastimes – joining youth clubs, learning a sport like tennis or swimming, or taking up an absorbing hobby. Then you will not need pilfering to bring excitement to your lives.

For several years now, I have this habit of masturbating. I am a 19-year- old girl who has a quiet, introverted personality, although I am very good at my studies in an engineering

 

My father passed away when I was only a year old. My mother with the help of my grandparents has brought me up with love and care. Now, I am 16 years old, and my grandparents are not alive. I have noticed a neighbour, a widower, is attracted to my mom. He is a good man and I wish they remain together.

Can I tell him frankly that he should marry my mother? She is very pretty and gentle, and I too would like to have him as a father.

I know my mother will not take the initiative because she is timid and also afraid of what our relatives will say.Please advise.”

It would not be right to approach this man with a marriage proposal for your mother, however much you may feel they are suited. Let two of them take the decision for themselves.

Perhaps you could create occasions when they can meet. You can invite him home to help with your homework or on some other pretext and allow the two of them to talk.

You cannot be sure how your mother feels about this idea of yours. Why not discuss it with her in a roundabout way? Is she ready for remarriage? You should also tell her that she is free to decide what she wants in life without thinking of others’ opinions.

When you leave the house to marry or study or take up a job, these people are not going to keep you company. Anyway, do not jump the gun, so to say, until you are sure about their feelings for each other.

 

college. I do not have boyfriends like the other girls have. In fact, I do not seem to need them at all. I have no intention of marrying too, for I am not sure that I will find a suitable mate due to my shy nature.

If people marry for sex, why should I marry anyway, for I get gratification just by myself? My parents though are very keen to have me settled in marriage. Please advise.

You may find sexual gratification through masturbation, but this does not mean that you will not need a spouse. A marriage is for companionship, family life, children and all the social activities which accompany the married status. Sex is of course an important part of marriage, but it is not the only part. So, for you to feel that you need not to marry, is not correct.

Perhaps, you feel incapable of making male friends easily, and so have come to this decision. Even shy persons can have a very satisfactory social life if they make a little effort. Join the company of friends as much as possible, attend parties and get- togethers even if you feel self- conscious and shy. Ask your elders to look out for a suitable groom for you, so that you can have a happy arranged marriage.

TEENACHE

This column is especially for ‘ J teenagers. Adolescence can, we know, “ Y be a trying and confusing time. There f are so many questions which seem to evade solutions. A wrong decision, or an indiscreet move, can spell disaster and ruin a life. Share your problem, worry or doubt with us and WE will help you find a way out — to ip happier, healthier and more succes^^t adult life. Send your problems                        f

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